The day’s of ‘hard’.

Teething bubba’s, working, studying and just general adulting can be really hard when you’re a parent.

My need for social encounters has more than halved, now that an outting now requires me to take pretty much half the house I catch myself finding quite a few excuses to stay home as often as I can.

Sometimes I can’t be bothered having a shower or changing our boys clothes at night before bed, sometimes, even though I’m trying to change my lifestyle for the better, body mind and soul, I catch myself with barely enough energy to get me through the day.

Sometimes I find myself thinking “who the F#+@ is meant to look after me?” Who’s going to do my washing, my dishes, let me sleep in, cook my dinner, fold my washing, ย put my washing away and the list goes on. But I know I sound so ungrateful, I’m not I assure you. Mostly I count my fortunes, after all, I’m a stay at home mum who has an incredible partner who works for his son and I so I can stay at home and raise our boy and follow my dreams of studying and starting a small business.

But holy moly, mama, your amazing. And it’s okay to let it overwhelm you, just for a short while.

All the love and support,

The Three Bears NZ.

I’m back!

I’ve been so caught up in my own little bubble that I haven’t allowed myself, or given myself the respect to just sit down, take a deep breath and release all of my negative thoughts and stresses. The truth is, as I stated in my last post: I haven’t felt myself. I’m working on getting on top of it, but as you all know, it’s easier said than done!

So much of my time and energy has/is going into the business and being a mother, to a now 3 month old boy (holy crap, where did the time go?!) that I haven’t had a chance to really think straight!

Now, I know it’s not just me, but I have found since becoming a mother and a parent that my grip on time has totally loosened and I have no idea if I am up or down sometimes! Days disappear as if I haven’t lived them at all, (sometimes I wonder if I have!) and other times days pop out of nowhere. It’s so hard to juggle everything and unfortunately writing this blog has been lost within the myriad of obstacles in my way and for a time, simply became a chore, which is not at all what the point in this blog is for me.

Well here I am, i’m going to ensure for my mental health, yet again, that I am regularly updating the blog!

Torben and Lex.jpg

The light of my life.

Where am I at now? Well, being a mother of a beautiful growing little boy cub is absolutely incredible! I consider myself so fortunate every day to have this little cub in my life and an incredible man by my side. Life is testing me right now but I am rising above, and currently feeling like a phoenix rising from the ashes. I feel like I can breathe again, and in turn I feel a light inside of me burning again that I haven’t felt for a long time.

I am trying to get back on the rails and look after myself in mind, body and spirit. My partner and I will be detoxing after my birthday and honestly, I am genuinely excited to get that part of our lives started so we can both be the best for ourselves and our cub. As much as I am trying to be happy within myself, standing on the scales for the first time in a year to find I am 100.9kg was a sad shock to me, and although I hate weight and would rather avoid owning scales, it still hit home and I keep telling myself to stop being so upset. Apart from, what feels like a huge setback, ย I am counting my blessings each day and allowing myself to remember that I am important and when one loves themself, they can learn to love more. I am giving in ways I know how and this brings me higher again.

I hope you are all doing well, I look forward to writing on a regular basis again! Thank you for your patience, you are all incredible!

The Three Bears NZ.

 

 

Life gets in the way.

I apologize for being so slack with the blog! As you know I’ve been prioritizing securing some sort of income as a sahm!

I’ve been so busy and my mind has been so full of nothing but being a mother to our child and starting up a business that I’ve really forgotten to maintain myself and my own well being. Being a mother is a huge balancing act, and I love it, I honestly do but I need to ensure I’m spending some time on myself. Even something as simple as shaving my legs, washing my hair, using my lovely face cleanser and putting time aside to look after my mental health. Because I’ll be honest, I haven’t been feeling myself, physically or mentally. This is my first child so I don’t know what recovery should bebe, and although I understand that every woman heals and different rates I still feel like I should be feeling better now.. did anyone experience an emergency c-section? And what was your recovery like? I’m at 12 weeks post partum tomorrow and it still looks like I’m 18 – 22 weeks pregnant! 


I’m trying to divert my mind away from the self depreciation but I find my mind slipping more and more. I know that I’ll get over it soon and I know I can over come this and get back to my old self, it’s just the in between.

Other than that, our new home is lovely, as stressful as the move was I could never find it inside of me to regret that decision. Our little cub is doing very well, he’s 12 weeks tomorrow and 3 months on the 19th! It honestly feels like an entire lifetime that he’s been in our lives but time is almost non existent at this point! I never know what day if the week it is let alone what time! 

Today is the first day my partner and I have been away from our cub as well! I’ll say more about that in my following post.

All of the love and support,

The Three Bears NZ.